How A Mutuality Mindset Attracts More Friendships and Opportunities
In this increasingly complex, connected world, both bad and good actions can hit from more unexpected places and spread farther, sparking more and more varied reactions. Consequently, each of us has the responsibility and opportunity to have a greater effect in this networked world. Thus it is especially valuable to learn how and why we are motivated to do what we do, including our instinct to imitate, our desire to belong and our longing for meaning.
Perhaps you, too, are sometimes overwhelmed by work tasks, the flood of wrenching news, or folks who repeatedly try to get you to do something for them. Even well-intended folks can cause problems and miss opportunities.
This may be a good time to take a breather and enjoy fresh insights on how to forge productive relationships in this day and age. Discover specific ways to engage with others that are mutually productive, time saving, meaningful, and even fun. By cultivating a mutuality mindset, you can attract apt partners to help you achieve your goals and in turn, help them achieve theirs. Learn how to create mutually productive friendships, thus increasing your capacity, and bringing out the better side in others. Find out exactly how to be involved in the power of pull, rather than push. In your work, cause, club, and social life.
Discover ways that you can accomplish more while uplifting and attracting others. Discover ways to be more frequently quoted, sought after, and appreciated. Learn how to empower others by making them feel heard and how this can result in being greater together.
Become uplifting, smarter and generate more clout by adopting a mutuality mindset, thus able to form healthy, diverse relationships. Most of the most meaningful and opportunity-attracting moments in my life have happened via my connections with people I grew to admire. Many had different talents, interests and sometimes even different values. Hint: adopt a mutuality mindset.
The most healthy relationships are not based on a quid pro quo yet an ebb and flow of mutual support over time.
One unexpected benefit of close friendships is increasing our self-knowledge. That’s because they see us more clearly, in certain ways, than we are able to see ourselves, found Friendfluence author Carlin Flora.
Why Move Toward a Mutuality Mindset?
One of our biggest mistakes we make is attempting to make others like us. Counter-intuitively, it’s not how others feel about you that matters most. Rather it is if they feel about themselves when around you. If they like how they feel, they are inclined to like you. In fact they will often project onto you the qualities they most admire in others even, sometimes, if you have not demonstrated that you actually have those traits.
Conversely, if they don’t like how they feel when around you, they will see the qualities in you they most dislike in others — even if you have not demonstrated those. Guess which feelings are felt most intensely and last longer? That’s why an early step toward mutuality is bringing out the side they most like in themselves.
One way to start on the path towards mutuality is to, seek sweet spots of mutual interest early in conversation. Ask follow-up questions to prove an interest in the other person and more fully understand something that matters to them.
Over time you will then have cultivated diverse allies and able to collectively see more sides of a situation, thus be collectively able to make smarter decisions faster about a potential problem or opportunity.
Such experiences draw us closer and more aware of our complementary talents. Then we naturally get more specific, thus reducing chance of being misunderstood.
Also your specific detail, example or story can prove a general conclusion yet not the reverse. Getting specific sooner boosts your credibility and memorability.
Tip: Make it easier, faster and/or more fun and convenient for others to do the right thing with and/or for others. Spur them to support and share by providing bragging rights, such as an enticing backdrop or other scene were they’ll want to take a selfie with others to share
Hint: Becoming ever more deeply connected with those you admire and love bolsters, in you, the traits you most admire in them.
Always seek to bring out others’ better side: One way: when the spotlight’s on you, specifically shine it on others. Get 60 more actionable tips in my book: Mutuality Matters: https://www.amazon.com/Mutuality-Matters-Opportunity-Adventure-Friendship-ebook/dp/B078T3V77T